Last week we began a conversation about compassion fatigue and the symptoms and risks of being an empath – feeling too much! One might say that the world is really struggling right now, and if you are sensitive to the suffering and struggles, your compassion meter is on overdrive.
But here is something to consider, we often overgive what it is that we need.
Consider: How and where do you overgive? This might be a clue as to what you need. Do you overgive into kindness? Do you overgive in patience, support, encouragement, financial support, or nurturing?
Once you answer this question, what would it look like to turn that giving onto yourself?
My journey with saving the worms shifted because I practiced this self-inquiry exercise.
On a personal note, I have had a family situation where I was being taken advantage of over the last year. My kindness and generous spirit were being abused.
Truthfully, I desperately wanted someone to step in and save me from the discomfort and painful experience. Fortunately, that never happened because I learned to do that for myself.
I found my voice and created healthy boundaries, and interestingly as I practiced that, I felt a shift in my perspective about saving all the worms.
But first had to be in touch with my feelings. Neglecting and discounting our feelings can compromise self-trust, confidence, and self-esteem. Remember, our feelings are just that, OUR feelings. And no one has a right to tell you that you don’t have a right to have that feeling.
Honoring our feelings is the very first step to practicing self-love and self-compassion.
That family situation made me feel vulnerable, angry, untrusting, manipulated, and unsupported. In the past, I would have brushed off those uncomfortable feelings and denied myself permission to feel out-of-sorts while desperately looking for ways to keep everyone happy and avoid conflict at all costs.
But I learned the hard way that the cost was greater than the rewards of keeping the peace. My health, self-worth, and well-being were being compromised. A price I am no longer willing to pay.
This week I urge you to get in touch with your feelings.
I invite you to download or print the Feelings Library here and the next time you are triggered or feeling out-of-sorts, identify the feelings the experience may be evoking.
Chances are you will have identified at least six or more.
Next, see if you can narrow it down to the strongest feeling.
Getting comfortable articulating and sharing your feelings can be one of the most loving and compassionate practices you can do for yourself—a real-life antidote to compassion fatigue.
Love and light my friends