If you've been following along the past few weeks, you'll know this week we've made it halfway around the Life Balance Wheel as we've taken inventory of your life. And this week and next, we are going to talk about your most important relationships.
Before we dive in, I'd like to invite you to reflect on what you are noticing so far about your life?
It is so easy to blame the area where you spend the majority of your time for what is wrong with your life, when in fact, this exercise can allow you to begin to see how that may not be true.
For example, maybe not paying enough attention to your health is impacting your capacity to be the best version of yourself at work or with your family. Or perhaps your lack of quality sleep impacts your energy and desire to eat healthier.
And I wonder if your deep relationship with money, or self-worth, may be influencing your ability to set healthy boundaries or limits on other areas of your life? Perhaps even keeping you from asking for a raise at work?
I love that we are taking our time visiting these areas of life because it provides an opportunity to reflect more deeply, contemplate, and assess throughout the week.
This week it is all about relationships. Once again, I suggest drawing a line down the middle and separating friends and family. Why, because we can choose our friends but not our family!
Let's start with family. Family, in this case, refers to children, parents, siblings, in-laws, extended family. This does not include significant others – that we will visit next week.
The question to be asked is how satisfied are you with these relationships? Now you may have a sibling that you are not very close with, but given the circumstances, perhaps the space the two of you have between you is exactly what is needed to keep the peace.
The question is really about YOUR satisfaction, not necessarily and only the quality of the relationships.
The relationship with your parent or-in-law may be complicated, and there is nothing you can do to change them. Still, somehow you have learned how to be in their presence by setting boundaries or not taking things personally. Therefore you have learned to let go, which makes that relationship the best it can be given the circumstances.
And of course, there are those familial relationships that are full of discourse and contention, impacting the quality of your life and peace. Or maybe these relationships are lovely and satisfying; however, you don't spend enough time with them? So once again, averaging all, what number would you give this area? Feel free to make some notes in the sidebar if it helps.
And then there are our friends.
Now you don't have to have a lot of friends, but the ones that you do have, do they help and support you to be the best version of yourself?
Do you help and support them to be the best version of themselves?
So, for example, if you decided that you were going to stop drinking alcohol, would your friends do everything to support that decision, or would they harass you and make you feel uncomfortable if you chose not to?
Do you nurture these friendships? Do they nurture and support you?
Another measurement of friends has to do with community. Do you have a like-minded community in your life? Friendships and community are important aspects of living a well-lived life and can also reflect the qualities and characteristics of who we are as individuals.
Community is so important. It could be a spiritual community, or stimulating thought leaders, like-minded creatives, health-conscious or adventure groups, or today many find purpose and meaning in activism.
Once again, give that part of your life a number. Speak your truth; awareness is the first step to transforming all things.
If you scored low in any of these two areas, I would like to invite you to consider why.
Why do you not have close, satisfying friendships in your life?
Do you spend so much time working that you have no time to nurture and cultivate these relationships?
Have you outgrown past relationships and doubt your ability to have new, healthy ones? Maybe you are at a different place in your life, such as being a parent, and most of your friends are still single and don't understand the complexities around parenthood. Or visa-versa, you don't have children, or your kids have grown, and you don't have much in common with your old friends.
And next, I invite you to consider:
What would it take to deepen your sense of meaningful relationships with family and/friends?
What are the obstacles that are getting in the way of improving these relationships?
How may the quality of those relationships be impacting other areas of your life?
These are all great questions to ponder this week.
And, of course, there is much, much more to be revealed!
Next week, we will discuss the relationship with your significant other or lack thereof.
Love and Light, my friends